It’s been a couple weeks since reports appeared online concerning Washington Wizards players Gilbert Arenas and Javaris Crittenton reenacting the OK Corral in the locker room. It was alluded to that a gambling debt dispute resulted in guns being drawn, and threats being made. A few days later, it turned out that there was neither anger nor loaded firearms involved. My first thought when reading the original erroneous headline was “Washington D.C. basketball players pulling guns? That’s not news.” (it’s not racist; I have been to the Murder McDonald’s, and I have seen the light.) My next thought, besides hoping someone got fired for the slip, was self-righteous irritation. I attributed this to our current culture of instant gratification, and our dependance on quickly formed, poorly edited news stories taken from kindles and twitters and magical unicorns that shit pistachio ice cream (all equally legitimate and reliable news sources). Then I remembered the presidential campaign of Harry Truman (see more below…or in a book somewhere) and I humbly apologized to the unicorn nearest me. Our fast-paced culture has it’s shortcomings, to be sure. But without that same pace, we wouldn’t have known the true story until weeks, maybe months later, after all plane tickets to the D.C. area were cancelled. So here is a list of some other headlines that…jumped the gun…in history. Most of them are much more earth-shattering than a simple court-side misunderstanding, but just think about reading these when they were first published, and not learning until months later that they were wrong. …god bless twitter.

1. “Passengers Safely Moved and Steamer Titanic Taken in Tow” (Christian Science Monitor, April 15, 1912) If you didn’t know it before James Cameron left Kate Winslet alone on a floating door, you know it now. This boat sank. However, initial reports told people that not only was everyone aboard the Titanic alive, but the ship itself was intact and being towed to port. Cameron apologized for Titanic by making Avatar. Wonder what those damn Christian Scientists had to do…

2. “Dewey Defeats Truman” (Chicago Tribune, November 3, 1948) In an attempt to make the deadline for the first edition, the Tribune decided to close the 1948 presidential election early and run their own headline. The picture of PRESIDENT Harry S. Truman holding up the Tribune with a smile can be seen in history books and political magazines to this day. Presumably, New York Governor Thomas Dewey took it pretty hard. Although among those most effected were his brothers, Huey and Luey, and close family friend Launchpad. Wait, what was I talking about?

3.”JFK Raps Fault-Finders In Nation” (The Lexington Leader, November 22, 1963) Imagine picking up a newspaper to see how the president’s address went earlier that day, and seeing that it apparently went well (haha, take THAT you lousy republicans!). Then you call your friend to talk about it, and you’re friend’s like, “Dude, the president got shot in the face on his way to make that speech.” Something about a grassy troll and a large suppository, you aren’t really listening…your whole world’s upside-down face.

4. “Congressman’s Flight Reportedly Forced to Soviet Isle” (United Press International, September 1, 1983) In the midst of the cold war, this report - stating that Georgia Congressman Larry McDonald and 268 passengers had been forced to land by Russian fighter planes - was stirring enough. Think of the outrage when it turned out that, rather than asking KAL flight 007 to land, those wodka-loving SOB’s put a missile up it’s ass, effectively creating conspiracy theories as big as JFK and 9/11. When asked why the incident occurred, the Russians began weeping, repeating only: “Fucking bear is fucking mother!”

5. “Kerry’s Choice: Dem picks Gephardt as VP candidate” (The New York Post, July 6, 2004) I remember the slight confusion after this article was released. It turned out Kerry had actually picked John Edwards to run with him, and no one told the Post. Imagine Gephardt’s reaction, like the cool kids finally invited him to play kickball, then yelled, “Just kidding, loser!” and ran off. Now imagine Edwards reading that with his morning coffee. This explains the original title of his memoirs: “John Kerry is a cheating whore.”

6. “‘Alive!’ Miners beat odds” (USA Today, January 4, 2006) We all remember this mining tragedy in West Virginia, and how dedicated the search and rescue operations were. Even with the entire country watching, multiple newspapers ran the story that 12 of the 13 trapped miners had survived. Turned out, there was a “slight miscommunication”, and in reality 12 had actually died. This leads me to the conclusion that either USA Today can’t tell the difference between dead people and the living (which would make them US Weekly), or that people in West Virginia really can’t count to 13. I mean, I saw Wrong Turn, but I thought that was just a story…

First and foremost, we would like to thank all of you who supported us on Sunday and followed the live blog. It was a big day for Sexy Gypsy, and it really set the bar high.

Unfortunately, the Academy set the bar pretty low for hosting this year. Hugh Jackman, while slightly entertaining and charismatic at first, bored us to death with the constant musical numbers. This is the Oscars, dammit, we didn’t watch the Grammies for a reason. Also, the new format for actor awards runs a little long for our taste. Do we really need past winners standing up there talking one by one about the nominees for this year? We know Heath Ledger was an amazing Joker, do we really need Kevin Kline to tell us again? And if Cuba Gooding Jr. wants to be on stage at the red carpets, maybe he should be in a movie that doesn’t suck ass.

So despite some random last minute decisions, Sexy Gypsy did pretty well in predicting the Oscars this year. Our preview was right on the money for the big categories, even if our ballots weren’t. Unlike past years, there were no really big upsets. So let’s recap:

Best Picture: We all knew that Slumdog Millionaire was going to sweep the awards again. Milk was an amazing contender, but couldn’t stand up to the sheer brilliance in editing, direction, sound, and writing that Slumdog brought. Well deserved.

Best Director: David Fincher and Ron Howard have done better work. Stephen Daldry’s presence, not only in this category, but also in every other category The Reader was nominated, was a ridiculous, unwarranted usurping of Sam Mendes’ rightful seat with Revolutionary Road. Van Sant gave him a good run for the money, but Danny Boyle couldn’t be ignored any longer. Well deserved.

Best Actor: Minus Brad Pitt, this category was stacked. Jenkins, Langella, Penn, and Rourke all gave amazing performances. But it really came down to the latter two, and even though Prop 8 could’ve pushed Penn to the win, he was fantastic, and at least Rourke is again on the radar. Questionable, but well deserved.

Best Actress: Anne Hathaway hasn’t been as typecast as most people believe. Her role in Havoc was enough for us to take her seriously. Unfortunately, she was up against two major actresses (not counting Melissa Leo or Angelina Jolie). However, Streep has had her Oscar recognition, and Winslet was due after so many dead end nominations. Well deserved, wrong film (should have been Revolutionary Road).

Best Supporting Actor: If you read our preview, you know our conspiracy theories in this category. But there was only ever a slight doubt in anyone’s mind that Ledger would walk with this one. His “eclectic” career aside, this was not only his best performance, but one of the best of all time. Hey Downey, why so serious? Well deserved.

Best Supporting Actress: This category wasn’t really stellar, but everyone did a good job in their roles. Amy Adams, however, was definitely a head above the rest, in emotion and in screen time. Predicting this one was disappointing, because we knew Cruz would take it for being involved in an otherwise-not-nominated Woody Allen film. Undeserved.

Other categories of interest

Foreign Language: Waltz with Bashir should’ve taken this, and most people thought it would. Always gotta be on the lookout for the underdog.

Shorts: It is surprising that On the Line or Manon on the Asphalt didn’t take it, considering they were more the Academy’s usual taste, but Toyland was interesting and well edited, and the only WWII film even nominated this year. Also surprising, but definitely exciting, was the Academy’s decision to look past Pixar’s usual animated brilliance and give the Oscar to La Maison en Petits Cubes, the emotional Japanese film with a French name.

Screenplay: Slumdog Millionaire was an amazing adaptation, as shown by its eight wins this year. However, we still believe that, with any other director, the script would have fallen short. Doubt, though sub par in acting and directing, was an amazingly well written film, full of amazing dialogue. Milk was the obvious choice for Original Screenplay. It built and developed all the characters for the actors to round out, and there wasn’t a weak link in the bunch.

Another surprise was The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. All three of this film’s awards (Visual Effects, Art Direction, and Makeup) beat out The Dark Knight, which was a thousand times better in all of them. This is either an apology to Fincher for ignoring Zodiac, or an apology to Brad Pitt that he will never, ever, ever be Batman. Robin, maybe, but not The Dark Knight.

Overall, a good year for movies, and a solid Academy Awards ceremony. We will of course be starting this all over again next November, but for now we return you to your regularly scheduled programming. Thanks for the support.

-Sexy Gypsy

Best Picture

Of the five films in this category, only two really have a shot. Frost/Nixon was a great stage adaptation with amazing performances and, while solid, was ultimately compromised by Ron Howard’s lack of technical abilities. The Reader was boring, poorly constructed, and probably the most overrated film in the last 20 years. And Benjamin Button was average at best.

That leaves us with Milk and Slumdog Millionaire. And it’s close.

Milk was perfectly casted, acted and edited. Thankfully, Gus van Sant showed enough restraint not to fuck it up with his usual annoyingly pseudo-artistic direction. Add to that the best performance of Sean Penn’s career and you have a serious contender for Best Picture.

But, unfortunately for Gus van Sant and Milk, 2009 is the year of Slumdog. With great music, flawless direction and screenplay, Slumdog Millionaire has finally brought Danny Boyle to the forefront of cinema. He’s a versatile director who can excel in any genre, and Slumdog’s complex, non-linear story line really allowed him to showcase his skills. The result was a beautifully executed film whose broad appeal, blending of cultures, and surprising rise to recognition puts it over the top.

WHO SHOULD WIN: Slumdog Millionaire

WHO WILL WIN: Slumdog Millionaire

Best Actor

Why is Brad Pitt in this category? He gave a much better, rounder performance in A River Runs Through It and is the weak link in this category with his one-note portrayal of Benjamin Button. Richard Jenkins is finally getting the love he deserves, after years of being “that guy”—you recognize him, know he’s in things, but you don’t know his name or why you seem to remember him (if you still don’t know who he is, he’s the dead father in Six Feet Under). Unfortunately, his well-developed performance will be eclipsed by the big three: Mickey Rourke, Frank Langella, and Sean Penn. This will ultimately be decided by politics: the resurrection of Mickey Rourke, the Nixon scandal, or the gay character post-prop 8.

WHO SHOULD WIN: Mickey Rourke WHO WILL WIN: Sean Penn, because the Academy loves him.

Best Actress

First off, the Academy needs to decide what constitutes a leading role, because Kate Winslet should have been up for Revolutionary Road, not The Reader, both for technical and performance-quality reasons. She’ll probably win, but only because Stephen Daldry is a marketing whore and has been politicking for The Reader like he was Blagojevich selling a Senate seat.

Meryl Streep and Angelina Jolie both had great roles, but it was more the writing than they acting that made their characters special. While Angelina Jolie will get a nomination for anything in which she’s not half naked shooting at people, Streep didn’t bring the expected veteran-actress energy to an already well written character—and it fell short.

Melissa Leo in Frozen River was an interesting choice. A small, low-budget, independent film shot in 24 days spawns a Best Actress nomination? But it’s a well-crafted story—solid throughout. As for Melissa Leo’s performance, as good a job as she did, she’s not beating out Streep, let alone Winslet.

Anne Hathaway, on the other hand, deserves credit for nailing her part as a fresh-out-of-rehab junkie—a role often cliched, parodied, and overplayed. Sadly, no one saw Rachel Getting Married. It’s not a great film but Hathaway more than makes up for it (Plus, Tunde from TV on The Radio plays her brother-in-law-to-be!)

WHO SHOULD WIN: Anne Hathaway WHO WILL WIN: Kate Winslet

Best Supporting Actor

Robert Downey, Jr. is an amazing actor and definitely deserves some fucking recognition. But Tropic Thunder? Really?? It’s picks like this that make people clown the Oscar. Everyone else was solid, but Josh Brolin, Philip Seymour Hoffman and Michael Shannon picked a shitty year to be nominated.

Philip Seymour Hoffman was miscast in the role of Father Flynn, and he did the best he could. Still, his subpar performance paled in comparison to most of his other work. Josh Brolin, though slightly outshone by the rest of the supporting cast, was impressive in Milk. He just seems to have bad luck—going against Daniel Day-Lewis last year, and now Heath Ledger. Michael Shannon had three great scenes, and blew me away in Revolutionary Road. He was the most interesting character in a Sam Mendes movie, which in itself says a lot, and he had a huge impact in his 120 seconds of screen time.

Yet as good as they were, Brolin and Shannon especially, no one is beating Heath Ledger. A solid, completely immersive portrayal of a psychotic clown in a movie that destroyed box offices everywhere? He deserves the award no matter what, and it only helps that he’s dead.

WHO SHOULD WIN: Heath Ledger (but only because he’s dead) WHO WILL WIN: Heath Ledger (but only because he’s dead)

Best Supporting Actress

How long do you have to be in a film to fulfill the “supporting” criteria? Viola Davis, though very emotional, had one scene in Doubt. However, she was just as memorable as Michael Shannon in her limited screen time. Penelope Cruz didn’t have a much bigger role, and she’s only here because she played a cup full of crazy in a Woody Allen movie, and her crazy wasn’t as good as crazies in the past (Wilkinson in Michael Clayton). But Amy Adams is a head above the rest in this category, and hopefully that’s enough.

Taraji Henson is here just because the Academy loved Benjamin Button, but it wasn’t a great film and she wasn’t all that good in it. Outside of Cruz, she’s the weakest nominee in this category. It was like she played the great-great-grandmother of her character in Hustle and Flow.

Marisa Tomei is the dark horse here. She gave an incredible performance in The Wrestler and she’s still ridiculously hot.

WHO SHOULD WIN: Amy Adams WHO WILL WIN: Penelope Cruz

Best Director

If you’ve ever read sexy gypsy, you already know our pick for Best Director. Motherfucking Danny Boyle.

Stephen Daldry is now on my shit list for The Reader—even more so for plugging the fuck out of an inferior movie and tricking everyone into thinking it was great. Who the fuck does he think he is, M. Night Shyamalan?

David Fincher is a great director with some amazing movies under his belt, but the travesty of Curious Case of Benjamin Button is not one of them. The sequence with Tilda Swinton and Brad Pitt was the only time you really saw Fincher’s influence, and it was the best part of the film.

Ron Howard is still Hollywood’s golden boy, so it’s not surprising he was nominated for Frost/Nixon. Aside from persistent anachronisms and mishandling of time, Howard preserved the spirit of the stage play and the camera work was excellent.

Gus van Sant finally decided to humble himself and make a solid, consistent film, and is really the only one who could challenge Boyle. The Academy loves him, and could look to make up for robbing him of Best Director in 1997, plus some Prop 8 guilt could come into play. This is definitely a category to watch.

WHO SHOULD WIN: Danny Boyle (with an honorable mention and apology to Sam Mendes) WHO WILL WIN: Danny Boyle

Conspiracies

• Who did Sam Mendes piss off? He is a great filmmakers and Revolutionary Road, though disturbingly depressing, was an amazing film. Camera work, editing, score, acting, screenplay—all great. Yet the Academy left him out of the running and even changed the nomination for Kate Winslet, calling her performance in The Reader a lead—a role which the HFPA considered a supporting a few months ago. I think he’s in the doghouse for some reason, and Michael Shannon’s nomination is an apology. I suspect that, though Ledger has it locked, they might upset everything and give it to Shannon, just to show there’s no hard feelings.
• Amy Adams deserves to win best supporting, but everything in Hollywood is political (which could also explain Winslet’s bump to lead role after Daldry’s whoring). My guess is that Cruz could walk with this one because the Academy loves Woody Allen and they’re sorry he made a dumb movie they can’t nominate for anything else.
• Again making up for its past mistakes, the Academy has shown major love to Benjamin Button. They want so badly to let Pitt have one, but Babel just wasn’t that good. And Zodiac, Fincher’s first Academy-worthy film, just came out too early for Oscar consideration.
• 4.) Robert Downey, Jr. has been in some great movies, always does his roles beautifully, and the Academy thinks he’s due for something. But since Charlie Bartlett got impatient and fucked off what could have been a serious, profound ending, he couldn’t get anything for that. And Iron Man was entertaining, but no actor will ever get an Oscar for playing a superhero. Downey’s next film is The Soloist with Jamie Foxx, directed by Joe Wright. It would have been a contender for the Oscars but was pulled from its November release date and slated for early March, 2009. So now it comes down to Tropic Thunder.

“How far would you go to protect a secret?”

Hopefully further than Stephen Daldry did in The Reader.

The Reader started out as an obscure little art film, before exploding into theaters after the Golden Globes gave Kate Winslet a Best Supporting Actress for it. I hadn’t seen too many previews for it, and I love Kate, but I don’t like Ralph Fiennes, so all in all I feel I was going in pretty objective.

The story seems simple, but it is long and drawn out. Michael Berg (Fiennes) is a middle-aged man with no serious relationships and an “estranged” daughter. As he sends his latest sexual conquest packing, he starts to reminisce about an affair he had when he was 15. The woman, Hanna (Winslet) was twice his age, and he spent a summer reading classic books and making love to her. Then, abruptly, she disappeared. Quickly cut to college law classes. His professor takes them to Berlin to witness the trials of Nazi war criminals, and he is surprised to find that she is one of the SS on trial. She is sentenced to life in prison, and Michael’s love gets the better of him. He spends the next decade reading aloud into a tape recorder and sending them to her in prison.

This is only Stephen Daldry’s third film (Billy Elliot, The Hours), and, admittedly, he takes on projects that are a little mature for a rookie. The stories don’t really allow for amazing camera work, superb editing, or anything technical. They are solid films, but not special.

The acting was good. But just good. Ralph Fiennes didn’t provide a lot of emotion. Kate Winslet is always good, and this was in interesting project for her, but she did an exceptional job in Revolutionary Road, and after seeing that, this performance just didn’t jump off the screen.

This review is somewhat difficult, in that the film jumps around so much in the timeline (back, forward, back, sideways, kind of unnecessary) and I don’t want to throw out any spoilers in any of them. What I will say is that this was probably an amazing book (written by Bernard Schlink), but the translation to the screen just seemed to drag on and on. I never got the feeling that Michael was really estranged from his daughter, the relationship wasn’t that bad. It never explained why his relationship with his parents was so strained. Basically, in every timeline, there was so much more that could have been said, shown, understood, but in a two-hour movie, you have to keep moving, and even then, every scene seemed to drag on. I’d like to think I’m open-minded when it comes to film, but this was…boring.

Some people really liked this movie. Some people really didn’t. I’m somewhere in the middle. It is not a bad film; it’s just not a great film. The nominations it received are strange to me and, like I said: if Winslet’s going to be nominated for something, give it to her for her dynamite role in Revolutionary Road, not this yawn-inducing Lifetime Original wannabe.

And the secret? Obvious in the first twenty minutes, frustrating for the rest of the film.

Final Grade: C+

So now that we’ve all had a chance to absorb the Oscar nominations, it’s time to start placing bets. We already mentioned that, in the last three years, every Oscar winner for Best Actor and Actress also won the Golden Globe. This year, however, the nominations aren’t even the same. Kate Winslet won Best Actress for Revolutionary Road, but the Academy decided to nominate her for The Reader. Not surprising, but still unfortunate, is the lack of nominations for Sam Mendes and Revolutionary Road. Michael Shannon is the only one who got a nod, with a Best Supporting Actor nomination. We’re still unclear as to why Mendes is absent on the ballot this year, especially when The Reader is up for Best Picture, and Stephen Daldry is up for Best Director (boring movie, and he’s a rookie).

Heath Ledger has a little more competition in this race for Best Supporting Actor, but we’re hoping he gets what’s due him after arguably the best performance of 2008. And kudos must be given to the Academy for calling our bluff in this category. Robert Downey Jr. is up for Best Supporting for Tropic Thunder; we’re still going to complain, but Downey really deserves an award after being overlooked for so long, so the razor blades we promised will not be forthcoming.

On a lighter note, Danny Boyle carried over all of his Golden Globe nominations, and he’s all over the Oscars. With any luck, the Academy will think outside its microscopic box and give credit to the underdog instead of going with the predictable choice (Ron Howard). The only movie to really rival Slumdog Millionaire this year was Milk. Gus van Sant deserves the nomination, maybe the win. The editing wasn’t as complex as Slumdog, but it was still good. And Sean Penn is definitely giving Mickey Rourke a run for his money as Best Actor.

The Supporting categories are also a bit strange, in that several of the nominees had very little screen time in the film. Viola Davis has like two scenes in Doubt. Penelope Cruz wasn’t really in Vicky Cristina Barcelona until the very end. Taraji P. Henson had a slightly bigger role in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, but it was three hours long, and you didn’t see her that much. Even Michael Shannon only had three scenes in Revolutionary Road. Not that this is a first for the Academy (Tom Wilkinson for Michael Clayton, Ruby Dee for American Gangster), we’re just not sure how you justify giving an Oscar to someone who wasn’t really in the movie.

This year will not be the clash of the titans that last year was, but there are a lot of interesting choices, some standard nominations, and some unexplainable absences. It’s really anyone’s guess, but here at Sexy Gypsy, we’re smarter than everyone else, including the Academy, so be on the lookout for our official Oscar ballot choices next week.

It’s 2009. The Golden Globes have come and gone. Obama is officially president. We can finally put 2008 behind us, right? Wrong. Tomorrow, the Academy will announce its nominees for the 2009 Oscars ceremony on February 22. Which means for the next month, you can add, “So who do you think will win best sound mixing?” to your repertoire of suave pick-up lines.

As we said, we’ve never really paid attention to the Golden Globes. Around this time of year, we’re usually already trying to predict not only the Oscar nominees, but also the winners. However, after the surprising sweeps by Slumdog Millionaire and Kate Winslet, we decided to read up on the HFPA and compare them with the Academy. We found some interesting stuff.

2006 was the year of Crash, at least for the Oscars. Strangely enough, it didn’t even get nominated for a Golden Globe, which went to Brokeback Mountain (over A History of Violence) and Walk the Line (over The Squid and the Whale). If that wasn’t weird enough, George Clooney and Rachel Weisz undeservedly won both awards for best supporting (Syriana and The Constant Gardener respectively), and Ang Lee won both for Brokeback Mountain (also undeserved).

2007 saw some interesting competition. Little Miss Sunshine, Thank You For Smoking, The Departed, Babel, The Queen…the list goes on. The Academy was, if nothing else, consistent in its awards (The Departed won a couple…). The HFPA, on the other hand, gave best picture to Babel and Dreamgirls, the latter actually cleaning up the Golden Globes, with Eddie Murphy winning best supporting actor (Alan Arkin wasn’t even nominated, seriously?) and Jennifer Hudson getting supporting actress in both ceremonies, which is just silly.

2008 was the closest race in recent years, so we can’t be mad at either group. Atonement got the Globe for best picture, No Country for Old Men got the Oscar. Julian Schnabel (The Diving Bell and the Butterfly) won a director Globe, The Coens scored the Oscar. The only travesty was Tilda Swinton winning a best supporting Oscar for Michael Clayton.

What we found interesting was that, in all three years, every Oscar winner for actor and actress also won the Golden Globe. Philip Seymour Hoffman (Capote) and Reese Witherspoon (Walk the Line) in 2006. Forest Whitaker (The Last King of Scotland) and Helen Mirren (The Queen) in 2007. Daniel Day-Lewis (There Will Be Blood) and Marion Cotillard (La Vie en Rose) in 2008.

So what will happen in 2009? Will Danny Boyle finally grab the gold? Will Mickey Rourke finally give an acceptance speech (it sure as hell better not be Colin Farrell). Or will the Academy condemn the HFPA for not at least giving Woody Allen or Sean Penn a reach-around for being overrated?

We’ll see tomorrow.

Here at sexy gypsy, we’ve never really been into the Golden Globes. Call us pretentious, purists, elitists; but there have always only been two categories: The Oscars, and everything else (Golden Globes, MTV awards, Darwin awards, etc.). This year, however, we decided to pay attention.

We stand corrected.

It is true that the Globes are a little more mainstream, and a little more forgiving. They stick to the basic categories (best picture, director, actor, screenplay) and they differentiate drama and comedy, allowing questionable films a place on the red carpet (the day Tropic Thunder is nominated for an Oscar, we’ll be passing out razor blades). This ceremony also focuses on television, a medium that many people still hesitate to consider legitimate art. For those of you on the fence, we have six words: Dexter, Entourage, Weeds, Californication, True Blood. The Hollywood Foreign Press Association recognizes these actors, actresses, writers, and directors in a way the Academy never will. However, even the HFPA makes mistakes.

David Duchovny,’s Hank Moody (Californication) is one of the best characters on television, in a show that features the best writing in years. Alan Ball, creator/writer of Six Feet Under, has switched genres and brings us the amazing and addictive new vampire drama True Blood. Yet Alec Baldwin, Tina Fey, and 30 Rock swept the comedy awards, while AMC’s lackluster (this season at least) Mad Men beat out two of HBO’s heavy hitters, True Blood and In Treatment. And, even though the HFPA gave due credit to Anna Paquin (True Blood) and the epic miniseries John Adams (HBO), they need to work on their judgment.

As far as the film awards, the phrase, “It’s about damn time” immediately comes to mind. After so many years of being underappreciated and overlooked, Danny Boyle, Mickey Rourke, and Kate Winslet finally got what they deserved.

Danny Boyle, though having a unique and amazing career, has never been nominated for a Globe or an Oscar. This year, his film took home four (Best Director, Best Picture, Best Screenplay, and Best Original Score all for Slumdog Millionaire).

Mickey Rourke (Rumble Fish, Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man, Sin City) has been getting a raw deal since his Razzie Award for Desperate Hours in 1991 (hence the substance abuse). 18 years later, the HFPA finally gave him Best Actor for his amazing performance in The Wrestler.

Kate Winslet has come close with 5 Oscar nominations and 7 from the Golden Globes (including 2 this year), but this was her first win. And she won both Best Actress for Revolutionary Road and Best Supporting Actress for The Reader.

Colin Farrell even graduated from the Teen Choice Awards, and brought home a Globe for his surprising work in In Bruges (Brendan Gleeson probably deserved it more, but whatever).

The most glaring problem this year was, sadly, unavoidable. It has apparent that everyone in Hollywood wants to fellate Woody Allen for everything he does. Because Vicky Cristina Barcelona was weak-sauce, and it still won Best Comedy (um, hi…not funny).

Overall, the Golden Globes made some good choices this year, at least for film. We only hope it’s an indication of the approaching Oscar nominations

And to anyone who would speak ill of Heath Ledger’s posthumous Best Supporting Actor award for The Dark Knight, shut your mouth until March, there’s already an Oscar with his name on it, and he fucking deserves it.

It is cold as I step out of the movie theater into the January air.  The streets are empty.  I am distraught.  I feel hopeless, sad, sinking.  Someone has broken my heart.  Someone has turned life upside down and kicked it in the teeth.  Someone has put me through so much over the last two hours, that I’m contemplating the best way to kill myself.

Why did you do that, Sam Mendes?  Why?

Film is about the suspension of disbelief.  It is about emotionally manipulating the audience, without making them feel like they’re being manipulated.  It takes a great director to do it well, and Sam Mendes is a great director.  American Beauty was an amazing debut.  Road to Perdition was the most beautifully crafted gangster movie in years.  Jarhead made me respect Jake Gyllenhaal.  And, though they weren’t the most uplifting films, they all had a dramatic flair, a tongue-in-cheek sense of humor, and amazing visuals that made me feel good about the film.

Revolutionary Road, as a story, was a perfect project for Mendes.  Based on the Richard Yates novel, and written for the screen by Justin Haythe (The Clearing), it is the story of a young couple (DiCaprio and Winslet) living in 1950’s Connecticut, trying to wrestle their personal demons, raise two children, balance their life dreams, and still maintain that “everything’s coming up roses”, picture perfect ‘50’s façade.  And technically (as far as camera work, editing, music, etc.) it is a well-crafted film.  I could tell two minutes in that it was Mendes behind the camera.  Stylistically, it was much like Road to Perdition, in that the modern, artful camera work and cinematography juxtaposed the time period and the film genre.  The main difference?

This one made me want to slit my wrists with a butter knife.

The first three minutes are good.  Happy, even.  Leo and Kate meet at a party.  They make eye contact, start a nice conversation, and slow dance.  Even in such a short time, Mendes shows you the beauty of a new relationship.  And then he takes it all away.  That is as happy as those two characters are in the film, and they are never that happy again.  The very next scene leads into a horrible fight between the now-married couple on the side of the interstate.  And for the next two hours, we have to squint to catch glimpses of happiness and hope, dreams and plans, amidst some of the most horrible, gut wrenching fights I’ve seen on screen in years.  This is Closer without the explicit sexual references.  This is The Break-Up without humor.

Several years ago, I was discussing a movie with a friend.  I liked it.  She didn’t.  She said that the audience was put through too much in the film, and the ending didn’t make up for it.  That is how I feel about Revolutionary Road.  There is no happiness, no hope, no second chances.  It is predictable in a way that, though you know what’s going to happen, you really, really don’t want it to.  You want so badly for things to work out ok, and the ending is a swift metaphorical kick to the emotional groin when you’re already begging for mercy.

There are several highlights in the film.  Michael Shannon’s character is perfect, a young man recently released from a psychiatric ward.  He is the only one willing to call the couple out on their problems, showing that, in the 1950’s, it takes a psycho to cut through the bullcrap and really see things.  There is also an amazing scene at the end that again reminded me of Road to Perdition.  However, a few scenes in this film feel forced.  The acting is off, the dialogue feels contrived; surprising, really, for two established actors.  That is the only detraction from the technical side of things.  However, I highly doubt that this will be nominated for any awards, and I hesitate to even add it to my Mendes DVD collection.  It is a great film, and a horrible story, and I’m not sure I would sit through it again.

Final Grade: B+

by The Great White Gypsy

Cadillac Records – Darnell Martin

It seems that musicals and music industry biopsies (no, I don’t mean biopic, I’m being ironic) are the new trend.  This appears to be closer to Walk the Line than Dream Girls, at least I hope so.  It’s fun to see modern musicians play old school legends (Beyonce as Etta James, Mos Def as Chuck Berry), and there’s even a tie-in with the Rolling Stones.  Plus Cadillacs are pretty.

Adrien Brody, Beyonce Knowles, Jeffrey Wright, Mos Def, Gabrielle Union

December 5

Punisher: War Zone – Lexi Alexander

I’m sure anyone who read Punisher comics sees how cool it is to transition from Thomas Jane to Ray Stevenson.  It’s the difference between a pissed off widower and a badass mercenary for justice.  My only concern is admittedly misogynistic.  Chicks don’t watch action crap like this, so why did a chick direct it?  Her last film about soccer hooligans beating the crap out of each other (Green Street Hooligans) had a bit more heart and substance than necessary for hitting someone in the face with a brick.  We’ll see.

Ray Stevenson, Dominic West

December 5

Dark Streets – Rachel Samuels

Film Noir meets musical with a little flair in this murder mystery based on the play by Glenn M. Stewart.  Writer and director are newbies, but there’s some talent in the cast, and the art direction.  The soudtrack and musical numbers are done by classic blues and jazz artists.  Worth a try, since I missed Repo.

Gabriel Mann, Bijou Philips, Elias Koteas

December 12

The Day the Earth Stood Still – Scott Derrickson

Remake of the 1951 sci-fi classic, the visuals and special effects look pretty sweet, and Keanu Reeves’ career can only be helped by a role as a Vulcan-esque alien.  Not sure why this is coming out in December instead of summer, but maybe the lines at the theater will be shorter.

Keanu Reeves, Jennifer Connelly, Kathy Bates

December 12

Timecrimes – Nacho Vigalondo

It’s true, there really hasn’t been a good time travel movie since Back to the Future II.  Even Ray Bradbury and Ben Kingsley couldn’t save A Sound of Thunder.  But if I’ve learned one thing, it’s that foreign directors can generally add substance and art to dead sub-genres.  Vigalondo is fairly new to feature films, but the premise looks promising.

Karra Elejalde, Nacho Vigalondo, Candela Fernandez

December 12

The Wrestler – Darren Aronofsky

Most people over the mental age of 15 don’t take wrestling seriously.  However, it appears a second-rate wrestler is the perfect character juxtaposition for Mickey Rourke, one of the most underrated actors ever.  It looks like a film with substance and style, which should be no surprise given Aronofsky’s resume (Pi, Requiem for a Dream, The Fountain).  Might not blow up the box office, but could get some Oscar credit.

Mickey Rourke, Evan Rachel Wood, Marisa Tomei

December 17

Seven Pounds – Gabriele Muccino

Muccino directed the original Last Kiss, and worked with Will Smith on The Pursuit of Happiness.  Smith has been slowly yet steadily broadening as a actor.  The exact plot is somewhat vague through the previews, but quests for redemption always tug at our heartstrings and guilty wallets.  Myself included.

Will Smith, Rosario Dawson, Woody Harrelson, Barry Pepper

December 19

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button – David Fincher

I’m still confused.  Are you sure it’s Fincher directing this?  I mean, he’s a great director, works well with Brad Pitt, but this really has a Tim Burton feel to me, in style and story.  Confusion aside, it looks really cool.  Brad Pitt ages backwards, it looks dark and eerie, with a soul.  David Fincher got robbed of any Oscar credit last year (Zodiac came out too early in the year.), let’s hope this one is his ticket to the red carpet.

Brad Pitt, Cate Blanchett

December 25

The Spirit – Frank Miller

Sin City was groundbreaking in story and visuals.  Sin City 2 and 3 are currently in production.  Frank Miller is a talented writer and director, but The Spirit, though intriguing, looks like space filler from a one trick pony.  300 stood out by itself, I’m not sure this one can, but I’ll give it a try.  I owe it to Frank, 300 is the reason I have a gym membership.

Samuel L. Jackson, Scarlett Johansson, Eva Mendes

December 25

Revolutionary Road – Sam Mendes

Although it made everyone sick to enjoy it, Titanic was the last time DiCaprio and Winslet were on screen together, and there’s some chemistry there.  More importantly, after seeing what Sam Mendes does to modern suburban life (American Beauty), I can’t wait to see what he does to the suburbs in 1950’s Conneticut.

Leonardo DiCaprio, Kate Winslet, Kathy Bates

December 26