I’m nearing the 1 year anniversary of my marriage to my terrific wife Ashley. And, of course, I’m focused on all things nuptial. That being the case, my morbid curiosity forced me to read an article about the marriage of an 8 year old.

My initial reaction was, “There was no way in hell that any 8 year could ever be legally married!” But upon further investigation it became clear—if you live in the “anything goes sandland” of Saudi Arabia, it is common practice to sell of your daughter in marriage at the age of 7 in order to release yourself from debt. And apparently, everyone else around you thinks this is completely normal. Because nobody says a damned thing. All of us on this side of the sand, think that these people are nuts. But on the other side, they seem to believe that children (and women) have no understanding of what is best for them.

This is evidenced by an appeal by the 8 year-old’s mother to annul this ridiculous marriage. Her appeal was denied because she is now divorced from the girl’s father and therefore has no legal rights over the child. If this isn’t enough for you, listen to this:

“A girl aged 10 or 12 can be married. Those who think she’s too young are wrong, and they are being unfair to her.”

That is a quote from Sheikh Abdul Aziz Al-Sheikh the kingdom’s grand mufti. Who knows what a grand mufti is? I have no idea. But I’m assuming it’s someone that should know the difference between their ass and a hole in the ground. Obviously this Sheikh doesn’t know that he’s saying it’s okay for little girls to be wed to grown-ass men. How sick IS this?

But don’t worry. This is a different culture that is going to be difficult for us to understand. I’m sure that cultural differences exist on our side, like women having rights, that must be mindblowing to them. So, I’ll leave you with this, the one reassuring fact coming out of this whole mess; the husband promised not to have sex with his wife (8 years old) until she hits puberty. Thank God. A 47 year old having sex with a girl of 13 is SO much better than with a girl of 8. Oh wait, no it’s still pretty messed up.

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